“So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key.
– Unknown

Are you feeling anxious about coming into counselling?

Well, you are not alone. Nearly everyone who comes to see me report feeling very nervous before they come.  I’ve tried to work out why this is and from what my clients tell me it can be one of a number of things………

Some people report that going into therapy, whether its face to face or online can be scarey because they are afraid there is something really wrong with them that they don’t know about, which could come out during therapy.  Not so, I have never found this to be the case. People who come into therapy want that introspection, people who have something wrong with them never look for counselling because they believe “Its everyone else’s fault”. 

On the contrary, coming into therapy indicates you are taking control of your emotional hurt/pain, because you want to feel better. 

Some people are afraid that when they open up in counselling, they might be overwhelmed by past experiences and not be able to predict the outcome of their feelings. They don’t realise that if they try to lock away past traumas or push down old hurts or wounds, trying to ignore it ……..that is when it becomes a problem and starts to drive us in the wrong direction. It is only by looking at the past, and resolving those hurts, that you can set yourself free.

The type of therapy I use does not dwell on past issues, together we would identify them only, therapy might involve a rewind session or looking at how you can move on quickly. 

Other people might carry unfounded guilt or shame from experiences in their past, and inadvertently think they are bad people because of it. And no one wants to be thought of as a bad person. But again, it is only by looking at our past that we can resolve it and move on and have happier relationships with everyone.

Depressed & Anxious

Depressed and anxious people are prone to predicting the future in a catastrophic way, so they might only see failure and fear, rather than a positive outcome from counselling. Don’t let fear be your driver. Ride the wave and who knows where it will take you. 

Some people feel pain, hurt, anger and resentments stemming from old injuries, and they hold critical feelings towards themselves and others for what happened and are afraid that all of this negativity will explode out of them during therapy.  Not so.

The type of psycho-therapy I use is multi-modal.  Meaning,……… that I have completed many, many different courses and I take the most effective and efficient tools from each model so that therapy is fast and effective. I can resolve a past trauma in one session using the REWIND technique, we don’t have to mull over past traumas for months. Remember therapy will help you find the answers to free yourself from unwanted behaviour and you can move on to a positive, mentally peaceful, more productive phase of your life.

Remember too that, your emotional health is just as important as your physical health. If you broke your leg……..the pain you would feel would be a signal that your body needs to heal. The same goes for mental and emotional states. When your leg heals you feel better.  The counselling process is a healing process.

It is useful to discuss your fears about coming into therapy with me during the first session. I can explain things to you and set your mind at rest.

Therapy shouldn’t be  uncomfortable either, it can be like refreshing a page or rebooting a computer system.